There is no sweeter crime than self punishment. It is a drug that no matter how many times you crawl into a corner and pull the blankets around you to sweat the addiction off, will lure back into its arms.
We wish to be punished just as much as we want to happy. Ironic, isn't it? When the chance of happiness is right in front of us with neon signs saying "Take Me", we somehow take a step back, crawl back into that little corner to blame ourselves about how miserable our lives are, partly because it's true, another part is because of our dark desire to get hurt.
The fact is, we are all masochists in our own way. We are all too familiar with what misery feels like, therefore we punish ourselves instead of taking that leap of faith towards the unknown, towards happiness. We welcome the pain because it feels so comfortable. We are afraid. We are cowards.